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 An Apology

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Dec 05, 2001
I have a terrible time inventing aliases to post under on the internet. Most people seem content to post under ridiculous pseudonyms like "zero cool" or "superdork", as though they were mentally challenged Alabama bred air force pilots choosing call signs for their role in the movie "Top Gun". I've never been particularly good at this. I have lately been choosing fairly ordinary names. I usually try to invent names that strike me as interesting or unique. In the case of T. Reginald Gibbons, it seems I was not unique enough.

More diaries by T Reginald Gibbons
The Funeral of Bin Laden
An idea Hollywood would probably pay millions for
Ask The Mad Scientist
An Important Issue
Question for The Mad Scientist

Had I done a simple web search, I would have found that there is a Reginald Gibbons teaching at Stanford, who is quite accomplished and well known. Ordinarily, I wouldn't be concerned about this. It isn't all that uncommon for two people to have the same name, after all.

I have, however, become worried that the real Reginald Gibbons may be suffering some inconvenience due to my recent article. It has come to my attention that there may be a small number of individuals who might have assumed that he and I were one and the same. They may even have gone to the extent of emailing him some of the gruesome threats that I received in response to my article, from people who, with the same breath, told me I was infringing on people's freedoms no less!

I would like to offer a sincere apology to the real Reginald Gibbons, and I hope that my thoughtless use of his name has not caused him to be subject to vicious email attacks from marauding nerds.

I would also like to announce that I am now changing my pseudonym to Robert Reginald Rodriguez. There is a Reginald Rodriguez at large on the internet, but I assume that those people who were unable to see the letter T at the beginnning of my pseudonym will not fail to notice the entire word "Robert".

(P.S. Thanks also, to adequacy and elby in particular for keeping the site running over the last few days.)


Sigh... (2.33 / 3) (#1)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 03:47:05 PM PST
If you were not such a damn idiot you would not need to make an apology. And for this website to actually let that completely ignorant article be posted is an atrocity. Hey Reginald, you will be very suprised to know that the very computer company you bought your computer from sells AMD processors!!!!!! I cannot imagine your IQ beeing anyware above the 50-60 range.

Sigh... (3.50 / 2) (#4)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 05:29:37 PM PST
There's only one person here with a substandard IQ (well, there actually seems to be quite a lot given the moronic responses to his article). Has the internet culture really beaten you with the stupidity stick so much that you cannot recognise satire when you read it?

Where is the satire? (3.00 / 2) (#5)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 05:50:04 PM PST
Excuse me for being a moron too, but where is the satire here?

satire or not... (4.00 / 1) (#7)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 06:32:09 PM PST
There are numerous parents who are ignorant to the internet that are going to read this and find truth in it.

Innocent children are going to be punished for something as dumb as being on the computer for 45 mins a day, which is 15 minutes longer than they "should be" according to your story. I see this as a terrible problem.

I may not be a parent, and I do know more about the cyber world than most people, but people like my parents would look at this article and take it seriously, being as computer illiterate as they are.

You not only need to apologize for your name, but you should apologize for the falsehood of your story.

- Anon

well.... (3.50 / 2) (#9)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 08:09:39 PM PST
he needs to apologize for wasting space.....but i applaud him for making me laugh so damn much

We don't need Nazis like you. (3.00 / 2) (#10)
by MessiahWWKD on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 08:53:30 PM PST
This is the typical response of a geek who supports "Free Software." If somebody such as RMS posts something that bashes Microsoft with lies and propaganda, and Microsoft tries to have it shut down, they will cry "BLOODY MURDER! CENSORSHIP IS WRONG!" When somebody posts an article against Linux or geeks, no matter what it is, parody or not, they will demand it be taken down. If geeks like you had your way, there would be no Adequacy or any other site that doesn't follow your strict guidelines of the "TRUTH" (i.e. RMS and geeks are saints while all the problems in the world are the fault of Microsoft and music artists). Only sites that cater to the lowest form of humans would be accepted.

I also seriously doubt the computer illiterate parents will ever find this site, and even if they did, I'd doubt they're morons like you and your parents, and will actually figure out the point of it. You sir, are worse than Hitler and I mean that.

I don't care if this sounds like a troll. I'm tired of geeks trying to take away the first amendment while trying to force everybody to follow that lunatic RMS just because some sites hurt their feelings.
Guardian angel, heavenly friend, walk with me 'til the journey's end.

It's got NOTHING to do with being a facist........ (none / 0) (#15)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Dec 6th, 2001 at 12:01:10 PM PST
Frankly, it has nothing to do with geek bashing or nerd bashing and whatnot. if this uninformed idiot had written an article saying that nerds are the lowest form of life and they should all be shot, nobody would care. why? BECAUSE IT'S HIS OPINION! Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion.

What this guy has done is written a "guide" to raising kids in conjunction with computers, when he CLEARLY has no business doing so.

That's the problem here. And really it doesnt matter whether the kinds of parents who this type of article would influence are going to come to this site. People can always do a little cut an paste for e-mails and whatnot. what matters is that some kids, (like this guys poor son), and going to be punished out of their minds for doing noting at all.

and people wonder why things like columbine happen these days. it's cause of these repressive ignorant pricks.

wrong-o buddy... (none / 0) (#16)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Dec 6th, 2001 at 04:31:53 PM PST
>>and people wonder why things like columbine happen these days. it's cause of these repressive ignorant pricks.

Somehow people get the idea that they can use tragic events to push their beliefs down everyone elses' throats. It doesn't matter that the events aren't related to the beliefs at all.

If you look at the actual facts instead of just making up whatever fits your politics, you'll see that these kids' parents did not repress them. The parents did not care what their kids did.

If anything I would say that it was probably playing violent video games like "Temple of Duke" that turned these kids into killers.

Not violence... (none / 0) (#33)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Jan 17th, 2002 at 02:46:07 PM PST
But instead when their much younger siblings watch Barney and they must babysit. I know shows like that make me want to kill people.

animated violence (none / 0) (#34)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun May 26th, 2002 at 03:10:02 AM PST
Animated violence never made me feal like kill anyone. Hell it actually calms me down. When I feal like starting a fight and busting ass I sit down and rape on CS for a couple of hours and I'm cool again. and it's kind of funny because the people I feal like killing are more often then not people that want to kill me or are blind followers to religion.

Everyone has an empty spot in them, some fill it with food, some with drugs, and some with religion. I fill mine with safe animated violence instead of religion which was created to control the masses. First to explain things that they couldn't explain then to help rule countries. But now religion has out lived itself and should just leave. Have me not evolved at all? Probably not it takes millions of years.


Hopefully you'll understand when you get older. (4.00 / 1) (#11)
by Marshall Badcock on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 10:46:42 PM PST
I don't want to find myself ten years from now in a world where I have to deal with whiney self-righteous dweebs that have no social skills because their parents let the internet raise their children whilst sipping their Cognac and watching movies on satellite tv.

And for God's sake, stop doing drugs!

Older.. (none / 0) (#14)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Dec 6th, 2001 at 09:42:37 AM PST
Yes, you're right, it would be much better to be raised by a parent such as mr gibbons here than any of the alternatives. mr gibbons, though he has no idea what his is talking about, is confident that he has the knowledge to tell his children, exactly what they are allowed to do, who they can do it with and, how many minutes they can spend doing it. And then when his fortunate children get out into the real world they will....

Children (none / 0) (#28)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Dec 15th, 2001 at 08:05:41 PM PST
Please, do the world a favor and *don't* have any children. I wouldn't want an opinionated, profoundly stupid parent such as you to be inflicted upon anybody. Try to think a little instead of reacting.

U R ON CRACK (none / 0) (#29)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Jan 8th, 2002 at 11:39:07 AM PST
Would you rather the world was full of people who did so much cocaine and pot that the are stupid enough to believe the ignorent crap you spew out..
At least my genrationis being raised infront of somethinghtat is mentally stimulating instead of A TV which does nothing mroe then rot your brain.

Instead of ffearing what you dont know embrace it you never know you mite put down your crack pipe in favor of it.



Satire? (none / 0) (#18)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Dec 7th, 2001 at 05:36:42 AM PST
It sounded more like an elaborate troll to me. Which, in case you don't get that here at (given that it's apparently "not tolerated" here), is something designed to get numerous responses, many of which are completely devoid of wisdom or logic or intelligence.

Frankly, I knew it wasn't serious but it could easily be taken as such, which is exactly what trolling is. In that sense, every one of those 1200+ people seriously responding to either that article or those people who responded to the article in kind has been taken for a fool and eaten by the troll.


Perhaps I too am a fool in this respect, and didn't realize that the site itself is a troll. After all, any site that would announce itself more popular that Jesus must have a trollish sense of humor, yes?

At any rate, have a nice day and come back soon!

You better post more apologies buddy (none / 0) (#17)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Dec 7th, 2001 at 01:10:20 AM PST
Either you live in a trailer park and see elvis often or your just plain fucking stupid If you think that comet curser and bonzi buddy are hacking tools you really need to look into hacking more and as for linux being an illegal hacking o/s i hope you were kidding There are enough morons on the internet with out schumcks like you helping things along If you havent guessed by the 1000+ responses to your How to tell your son is a hacker YOU TAKE FUCKING IDIOT TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL!!!!!

m4y y0u b3 r4p3d by w0mb4t2

(^) (><) (^) fu bone smuggler

Consolation (none / 0) (#23)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Dec 11th, 2001 at 08:25:05 PM PST
Woah buddy, its ok. I am in the same boat as many of these people that replied and we one of the few that went further in depth to see the validity of the author. However, your words are a bit cruel and harsh. He has discribed me to a 't' and yet as the many of us reply with threats and accusations of idiocy, we just make oursleves look worse by cursing and spouting obseneties.
If only 1: "T Reginald Gibbons" could appologize for some of the misinformation and 2: this unruley mob of people who are on the computer a lot could keep there comments a little more civilized and appropriate; something you wouldn't mind your child reading.
To T Reginald Gibbons: Just remember, there are many people who are offended due to the article and, though I don't agree with the way it was handled by many of them, I feel they do have a genuine point of concern. Remember that not everyone is evil and a hacker because they like computers, and that there are civilized people that posted appropriately (and some rather inappropriatly) the corrections to the post. Thank you for your time.

thank you (none / 0) (#19)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Dec 8th, 2001 at 11:40:34 AM PST
the original hacker article was amusing, but the responses were truly gut-busting. it has been a long, long time since i laughed so hard. thanks. even if it is trolling.

btw didn't robert rodriguez do spy kids? how about calling yourself george harrison? i understand the name is available.

h0h0 (none / 0) (#20)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Dec 9th, 2001 at 01:17:00 AM PST
I mean like how stupid can u get? Telnet: used for accessing shellz so u can run bots and learn unix, as for connecting to other peoples computers without a telephone? what the hell do u mean! if u couldn't connect to another computer without a telephone then the internet wouln't exist! Bonzi Buddy: Some damn stupid internet program that hogs ur CPU and connection. Flash: LMFAO! Is a animation player not some little hackers program, All it does it play a .swf that IE has downloaded for it! Comet Cursor: Stupid ass little spy program, any hacker would rather die then use it! It would track his internet habits revealing him to the authoities! Linux: The BEST BLOODY PROGRAM IN HISTORY!!! Linux well does let u hack easyer but it very powerful and fast, so why woun't any one want it? And as for if wondows die your computers broken: RAOTFLMFOA! WINDOZE 5ux0rz why any one could use a r00t l4m0r and send 10,000,000 print jobs to ur priter while ur asleep saying "Peter is c00l, and for Telnet, Fuck off" Quake: NO ONE INSULTS MASS MULTIPLAYER GAMES! Why I should run over to ur house and rip ur eyes out using bent hot pokers. So all in all next time, think first, ask other peoples optinion before u go off sp4nking ur sonz arse! So as for that: I fart in ur general direction!

And as for this system, it sux! <script lang (none / 0) (#21)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Dec 9th, 2001 at 01:18:26 AM PST

You are my hero (none / 0) (#22)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Dec 10th, 2001 at 11:37:21 PM PST
I salute you T Reg. Contrary to the mindless reactions posted here, you are not obliged to be an educator just because you post in public. You are not required to make sure that every reader understands your parody. To argue in that vein is as pathetic as the people who took the troll seriously. It suggests that we speak always to the LCD, to save the poor idiots from themselves. It's the same stupid logic that argues for lowering test standards rather than improving education. If anyone bases their parenting on a single article they read online, a pardoy disclaimer only would have sent them on to another source they could enlist to think for them.

Information Warfare at its best (none / 0) (#24)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 12th, 2001 at 01:40:18 PM PST
Perhaps you are Reginald Gibbons. And now got scared by the response you created.
Who knows? Perhaps you just trying to confuse your readers - which seems not to unlikely, if I consider your "Hacker"-Article.


what state are you from? (none / 0) (#25)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 12th, 2001 at 03:32:36 PM PST
just curious

OK (none / 0) (#26)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 12th, 2001 at 06:12:18 PM PST
I have come to two final conclusions.

1. You are someone, possibly a hacker, who really likes screwing with people. If you are intelligent enough to find this site and use it, you must know something about computers, and someone who has never seen a computer would write something as absurd as that. So, you like throwing something to the animals, and watch them fight over it.


2. (See other 200+ comments about you)

DUDE!!! (none / 0) (#27)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Dec 14th, 2001 at 09:07:58 PM PST
Dude, your way too opinionated, stuff like that gets ya fragged on the net, mellow dude, stop dissing everyone who isn't you and just enjoy the world around you.

God Bless You, T Robert Reginald Rodriguez Gibbons (none / 0) (#30)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Jan 13th, 2002 at 01:45:20 PM PST
I just came across the "is your son a computer hacker" post yesterday. What a beautiful, inspired thing it was. I especially loved the brady bunch reference.

Keep up the good work. By the way, I was totally floored reading the responses. I would never have expected the miss-rate to be so high.

-a fan

ROTFL!!!! Thanks Thanks Thanks (none / 0) (#31)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Jan 14th, 2002 at 09:30:24 PM PST
You know how some people can laugh at other's stupidity????? Well I just discovered I have that trait. Thanks for such a fantastic job writing that article. I posted the article at an Aussie/Kiwi website and everyone (who by the way are shoot-em-up online players) recognise the article as a joke.

GOOD WORK GOOD WORK GOOD WORK! I look forward to more thought provoking articles from you.

This better be satire (none / 0) (#32)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jan 16th, 2002 at 10:02:18 PM PST
I sincerely hope that the majority of your posts are examples of satire. Although, if they are, it is clear that you are a most irresponsible person. A perfect example of harmless satire gone to far was the psychological analysis of the Pooh characters. A complete joke... and yet people took it seriously. This is much worse. As has already been said... innocent children will be punished and *gasp* spanked, because of your story. Remember the problems that were caused by a certain radio program (i.e."war of the worlds") that people actually believed was happening... if these are your real opinions then i pity your family and i hope you realize that the discrimination you so avidly support is a clear indication of where you will be going after you die... stupid mofo...


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