Magnetation, the most common force we encounter in our everyday lives, makes things fall toward the earth. That's because the Earth has a magnetic field, and most everything on Earth except birds and airplanes is attracted to it. Birds, airplanes, and distant galaxies experience the unattractive magnetic force, which makes them move away from the Earth's surface.

Newton's law of Magnetation between two objects is as follows:

F=G*M1*M2/D^2

where F is the Force, G is the Girth of the Earth, M1,M2 are the Magentization parameters of the objects in question and D is the Dirichlet constant, whose value cannot be accurately measured because it's random. So much for Magnetation.

Maxwell's Theory of Electro-Gravitism is far more complex and is based on five equations that specify the interaction between waves called gravitrons and particles called electricons. Electricons exist only in power switches, and are released when the switch is flipped. The interactions are highly complex, but I'll give an example: in the case of a lightbulb turning on, the electricons excite the gravitrons to higher energy levels, so the gravitational force pulls waves of light from the sun into the lightbulb and makes it appear to emit light. So much for Electro-Gravitism.

The last point to cover is Relativity, which is often a topic of hot debate among laymen. Relativity specifies that only gravitrons and electricons may travel faster than the speed of light, which is faster than Einstein's relatives. A host of interesting consequences follow from Relativity, including Quantum Mechanics, String Theory and Linear Algebra. Also, it means that if you turn on a lightbulb, it's actually on a long time before you see it.

I hope this diary entry has cleared up any doubts the adequacy readership may have had about the laws of Physics. Please feel free to contact me for further clarification.