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 Beam Me Up: There's No Intelligent Life in Congress

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Jul 21, 2002
 Comments:
One of America's greatest Congressmen ever, James Traficant, is the subject of a House panel inquiry over possible ethics violations and faces a House vote on his expulsion. Like any red blooded American, though, he's not taking these accusations lying down. In fact, if he falls, he's going down kicking and swinging, or possibly moon walking, not meekly at all.
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"And, Congress, if you still believe the propaganda about the assassination of JFK, by God, you still believe that Mae West is a virgin."

Convicted of corruption, tax evasion, and bribery in April, Mr. Traficant, faced with only the second expulsion of a sitting Congressman since the Civil War, has refused to resign his position (NY Times, free reg, etc). While some would urge him to spare the country the ordeal and spectacle of a full House vote, Traficant has declined. Believing that his trial was a setup by the FBI and the IRS (or Internal Rectal Service, as he puts it) and unfailingly proclaiming his innocence, he intends to do everything he can to keep his Congressional seat.

"I apologize to the committee. If I had known, I would be here. I was on other media broadcasts trying to demean you and everybody else."

He rose to power after successfully defending himself from FBI allegations in 1983 that, as county sheriff, he had accepted bribes from local mobsters. Traficant proved to the jury that he actually was trying to ferret out the criminal element in our midst, but had neglected to tell other authorities about his plans. After that, he was elected to Congress in 1984, where he has served nine terms.

"I've been under investigation even since I walked out of the 1983 trial -- because I beat 'em."

Many in Congress believe that a conviction, warranted or not, makes someone unfit to serve their country. James A. Traficant, Jr. is not one of those men. He is matter-of-fact about going to jail. He even thinks that it is likely. However, this man will not let the possibility of prison deter him from his duty. Although he has run as a Democrat for the past eighteen years, he will campaign for his House seat as an Independent; Traficant will not let others keep him from what he feels is his duty to serve the people of Ohio, even if he's incarcerated. In fact, he "might just well be the first American to win a congressional seat while incarcerated."

James Traficant represents what America is about. This colorful, maverick character has been enlivening Congressional hearings for nearly twenty years while serving his constituents, who have elected him to represent them nine times. He has held true to his conscience all the while, and we find that admirable. Congress needs more men like him.

To close, we wish the best to Mr. Traficant in his coming hearing, and would like to end with the phrase that has become his trademark over the years:

"Beam me up."

       
Tweet

What's with all this WE shit ... (none / 0) (#1)
by Narcissus on Sun Jul 21st, 2002 at 11:41:17 AM PST
You got a turd in your pocket or something?

He should fry for what he's done.


--------------------------------
Ok, who picked the flower???

But he's a Real American Hero (none / 0) (#18)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Aug 6th, 2002 at 02:13:09 PM PST
Nonsense, by patrioticly denying his obligation to pay taxes, which are a liberal-democratic, if not communist, conspiracy to undermine the fragile American economy, Traficant has upheld true American values. Besides, there's nothing wrong with bribery. People with money are morally superior to those without it, and by outright bribing, instead of hiding behind lib-dem foolishness like laws and ethics, he is deminstrating the kind of home-grown honesty you would never expect to find in a Democrat. There is no greater man in American politics today than congressman Traficant, with the possible exception of President Bush.


 
Ha Ha! (none / 0) (#2)
by Anonymous Reader on Sun Jul 21st, 2002 at 10:54:48 PM PST
That's "rich"! The congress of Americans is convicting one of their own for bribings, when bribings is how American goverment works!!

All of Americans government is about taking the money from special interests to run the campaigns, then when they get elected, the congress is giving tax breaks and budget funds to special interests groups.

The congress is just singling out this one person to make themselves looking the "morally correct", when they are all taking bribings all the time from big agri-businesses, unions, and immigrants, etc. I am laughing at you poor Americans stooges!

Here in France we are fed up with the dishonest of bureaucratics, that is why we vote for National Front who will open the closets and clean up the dead wood with the scales of justice. When will the America do this too? Soon for your sakes I am hoping.


lol--fiery rhetoric that. (none / 0) (#3)
by StAnthonysKidnapper on Mon Jul 22nd, 2002 at 12:29:56 AM PST
special interests/interest groups are not as powerful as they may have been in the past. what is a bigger problem these days is simply that our government is increasingly run by the corporate execs themselves as they cross over and dip their grubby hands into the political machine. but I suppose that's no surprise, no big change.

as for your french politicians, i wish you well, but I wouldn't get my hopes too high. politics is just an inherently corrupt system.


 
Unwanted advice thank you (none / 0) (#4)
by HatBot on Mon Jul 22nd, 2002 at 01:17:51 AM PST
You know about as much about American Politics as you do English, a trifling small amount. Stick to your own commie language and special olympics quality government.


Wow! (none / 0) (#5)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Jul 22nd, 2002 at 03:52:59 AM PST
Are you really that stupid? Or are you willing to show that Americans are the first in dumbness, moronism, and the like, as they are in every other thing.


If you're gonna bash my country (none / 0) (#7)
by Narcissus on Mon Jul 22nd, 2002 at 09:32:25 AM PST
then at least have the courtesy of telling me where you hail from so that I can proceed to tell you how bad off you really are compared to me.


--------------------------------
Ok, who picked the flower???

No! (none / 0) (#12)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 24th, 2002 at 02:34:32 AM PST
No intention to bash your country. Just one stupid citizen of your country., who I think is giving a bad impression about it. Tou don't like it? Go bash my country: The World.


You gotta admit (none / 0) (#17)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Aug 2nd, 2002 at 04:18:27 PM PST
The man has great hair.


 
Yes! (none / 0) (#13)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 24th, 2002 at 02:37:06 AM PST
I know. On this site, one typo may make you the ultimate moron.


 
Hello. (none / 0) (#8)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Jul 22nd, 2002 at 04:42:09 PM PST
Please use English when on The Adequacy.

Thank you.


 
Excuse-me (none / 0) (#6)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Jul 22nd, 2002 at 04:15:37 AM PST
I am French too, and I don't agree with you. First, because when Mr. Jean-Marie Le Pen friends get elected, with exactly the same program, they do not clean anything, they just take care of themselves and their friends, and are not less corrupted (see all those cities in the south of France, see Austria).

Second, how would I trust the one and only politician in France who became a billionnaire while doing politic?

Third, the guy only knows one cause for any problem: immigration. That is plain bullshit. He has no economic program, or at least never has said how he would pay his reforms.

And finally, I do not agree with that politician (don't remember who he is, but I'm sure he'll never get my vote) who said, probably wanting to get some of Mr. Le Pen's votes, that who voted for Mr. Le Pen was not bad, but lost. My opinion is that who vote for that man after hearing his speeches, knowing his projects, is bad, or stupid.




money (none / 0) (#9)
by First Incision on Tue Jul 23rd, 2002 at 06:18:44 PM PST
I'm just curious. Is that a billion francs, or a billion euros?
_
_
Do you suffer from late-night hacking? Ask your doctor about Protonix.

Billions? (none / 0) (#10)
by gzt on Tue Jul 23rd, 2002 at 07:57:34 PM PST
And also, is that the French usage of the word 'billion', or the American?


Yes. (0.00 / 1) (#11)
by tkatchev on Tue Jul 23rd, 2002 at 11:50:11 PM PST
But my penis is still bigger than yours.


--
Peace and much love...




Ok, chief (none / 0) (#15)
by gzt on Wed Jul 24th, 2002 at 10:59:51 AM PST
In American or French units?


 
Billions (none / 0) (#14)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Jul 24th, 2002 at 02:40:30 AM PST
Billions of euros, now.

Billion, American usage (when in Rome, do as the roman do). I do my best to respect American usages on this American site.


 
UPDATE! (none / 0) (#16)
by Captain Tenille on Thu Jul 25th, 2002 at 11:59:57 AM PST
<A HREF="http://www.cnn.com/2002/ALLPOLITICS/07/24/traficant.expulsion/index.html">He's been expelled!</A> Let us hope that Congress reconsiders what they've done.
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