A Penny for the Guy!

Stories

Diaries

Polls

Users

Web Adequacy.org

Home

About

Topics

Rejects

Abortions

This is an archive site only. It is no longer maintained. You can not post comments. You can not make an account. Your email will not be read. Please read this page if you have questions.

A Penny for the Guy!

Author:

typical geek

Topic:

General

Posted:

Nov 04, 2001

Comments:

And a Happy Guy Fawkes day to you too! Isn't it nice to have something fun that takes our minds off terrorism!

More stories by

typical geek

	Once again, blame Microsoft!
	Islam is not the enemy
	We must invoke the Monroe Doctrine!
	God bless the Queen Mum

For all you Joe Sixpacks out there that don't know what Guy Fawkes day is, allow me to explain. It's a quaint English custom, sort of a harvest festival, where little urchins build scarecrows named Guy Fawkes, light bonfire, and go around asking for pennies, though I daresay the scamps would happy with a farthing or ha-penny, too. A charming, Olde Worlde holiday, and a welcome diversion to all this terrorist nonsense. So, if you're an Englishman, or you meet any Englishman, Happy Guy Fawkes Day!

	boom (5.00 / 1) (#1)
	by clays on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 04:34:22 AM PST

	stay away from the parliament building building today

	editing (0.00 / 1) (#2)
	by clays on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 04:35:11 AM PST

	how do i edit these bastards

	Yes yes, very droll. (none / 0) (#3)
	by Anonymous Reader on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 11:41:14 AM PST

	...and a welcome diversion to all this terrorist nonsense. For any ignorami usaniani who fail to see the trace amounts of irony contained in the above snippet, read up on it.

	Why so eager to (5.00 / 6) (#5)
	by Mint Waltman on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 12:02:33 PM PST

	..point out the irony? Typical Geek's piece was finely crafted, yet you came in like a bull in a china shop and gauchely proclaim, "IRONY, IRONY! EVERYONE LOOK! I RECOGNIZED THE IRONY! Did you???" You absolutely ruined the moment. How abominably boorish. I just hope hateful Catholic radicalism as personified by Guy Fawkes is indeed a thing of the past.

	Guy Fawkes may have been misguided (none / 0) (#6)
	by Adam Rightmann on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 12:12:04 PM PST

	but the prejudice against the true Church in England at the time was real. Considering how convenient the anti-Catholic hysteria and repression was after the discovery of the Gunpowder plot (poorly mixed Saltpeter, Sharcoal and Sulfur Plot may be a more accurate name), who knows who was ultimately Fawkes puppetmaster. A. Rightmann

	Guy Falkes Day is a National Celebration (5.00 / 1) (#8)
	by bc on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 01:28:04 PM PST

	It was a glorious day when our incipient democracy and liberties were saved from the Catholic threat. When you consider the terrible history of the Catholics in the UK, who have variously Revolted (twice!), with the Jacobite rebellions of 1715 and 1745, when they tried to put the clock back and restore a tyrannical Catholic Monarchy, only to be stopped by the vigilance of Hanoverian supporters throughout the Kingdom. Terrorised, not just Guy Falkes, but the IRA, the Real IRA, and many other paramilitaries, with their campaigns of bloodlusty bombings throughout the UK. Incited revolutions, Charles I and his horrible papist wife even tried to ally with the Irish and bring an Irish army to England to fight against us! Thank God for the puritans, Cromwell and the National Covenant in Scotland. Early Communist movements like the Chartists were closely associated with Catholicism. Interfered with the sovereignty of a woman's body, by attacking abortion, contraception, and such. Sympathised with enemies of the State, such as the French, Spanish, and so on, throughout the years. it was the Catholics who wanted Queen Elizabeth I, the greatest ruler the world has ever seen, to marry that dago Philip I. It was the Catholics who wanted the German Bonny Prince Charlie to be installed King over the English House of Hanover. It was the Catholics who sympathised with Napoleon Bonaparte, and who assasinated Spencer Percival. So Guy Falkes Day is truly to be celebrated, it is the day we, the people of Britain, stood up and defended our ancient liberties as enshrined in the Magna Carta, and bullied out the Catholics with their bizarre notions of 'divine right of Kings' and 'supremacy of Rome'. To be sure, the Catholics like idols and icons, but treating the Monarch as the Son of God is blasphemy. I, for one, just ♥ Guy Falkes day! ♥, bc.

	minor correction (none / 0) (#11)
	by nathan on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 07:22:24 PM PST

	...Queen Elizabeth I, the greatest ruler the world has ever seen... except for Alexander, of course. Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Frog point of view (none / 0) (#23)
	by hauntedattics on Tue Nov 13th, 2001 at 02:48:35 PM PST

	Charlemagne, anyone? Anyone? Mme. Chauvinisme

	you mean "charles the pansy" (none / 0) (#24)
	by nathan on Tue Nov 13th, 2001 at 06:46:33 PM PST

	Certainly compared to the awesome Alexander, who trampled Rome, Egypt, Greece, and the Persian Empire under his feet, before subduing the bandits of Central Asia for the only time in history, and beating the rulers of Western India. Charlemagne, on the other hand, tenuously held a few shreds of land in Europe. cough I can tell you, if Alexander had been Roland's uncle, he wouldn't have bit it from some Basques. Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	OK then... (none / 0) (#25)
	by hauntedattics on Wed Nov 14th, 2001 at 05:30:01 AM PST

	Genghis Khan? Pretty impressive to conquer (most of?) China plus get a bunch of squabbling Russian noblemen to pay you tribute. And hey, let's face it, successfully fighting land wars in Asia is no mean feat.

	fascinating challenge (none / 0) (#26)
	by nathan on Wed Nov 14th, 2001 at 07:45:24 AM PST

	Remember in the 'Gorgias,' where Socrates claims that tyrants are the weakest, most wretched of men, because they cannot even rule themselves? Alexander ruled Persia as a Persian and Egypt as an Egyptian and Greece as a Greek (not a Macedonian.) He didn't need to destroy his subject countries. He was much more of a reformer than Genghis Khan; a better ruler, hence a greater and more powerful man. Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Hmm... (none / 0) (#27)
	by hauntedattics on Wed Nov 14th, 2001 at 09:13:23 AM PST

	Well, I'll take your word for it about Socrates because it's been (ahem) quite a while since I last studied philosophy. And let's face it, most of it ain't great T reading. But how did ol' Mr. Wily Alexander get away with being from 3 different countries when he was really Macedonian? And let's not forget that he died at age 32 or some such, and so didn't really get to enjoy the fruits of his labors for very long. If you're gonna go for length of rule along with breadth of territory, I think Victoria's your chick.

	Al (none / 0) (#28)
	by nathan on Wed Nov 14th, 2001 at 12:53:55 PM PST

	had no qualms about 'going native' - something that was to prove a bit of an issue for the estimable Vicky. I have to admit, she did do quite well for herself. On the other hand, Al enjoyed lots of strapping, lean young lads. I'm referring, of course, to the way his soldiers' marching stirred his soul. He conquered many defended cities, breaking in the resisting door and satisfying the people who, for so long, had been wrapped tightly in the bands of repression. Vicky, on the other hand, lost her own Al in relative youth... Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Hmm... (none / 0) (#29)
	by hauntedattics on Wed Nov 14th, 2001 at 02:59:40 PM PST

	Now that is impressive. If Al was able to do all that, in all those different cities, then he wins the prize. There is of course the issue of the estimable Scot who was Vicky's companion after her own Al shuffled off this mortal coil. Perhaps he was a match for all those lean, strapping lads in the ancient Middle East... So...Alexander...Alcibiades (sp? sorry, can't remember) ...am I seeing a pattern here?

	you have (none / 0) (#30)
	by nathan on Thu Nov 15th, 2001 at 04:51:57 PM PST

	ONE try to guess my middle name! Nathan -- Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

	Hmm... (none / 0) (#31)
	by hauntedattics on Fri Nov 16th, 2001 at 05:53:33 AM PST

	Could it be...Stanley? No, just kidding. Well, then of course Alexander was the most kickass ruler ever! Right after Hauntedattics the Great, who ruled over, uh, one duplex in suburban Boston. Actually, my real name would sound better as the great, but I'm feeling the need to be coy until I get to know everyone better around here.

	Editorial warning (none / 0) (#14)
	by zikzak on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 10:12:02 PM PST

	I will be continuing my abuse of editorial powers as planned. In light of this, any comments making use of the code `& h e a r t s ;` in order to render ♥ in my browser will be deleted.

	Excellent. (none / 0) (#15)
	by RobotSlave on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 10:34:47 PM PST

	I hate those little blocks cluttering up the posts. This is the sort of thing that Editorial Powers™ should be used to prevent. Carry on with the swift and just application of Editorial Powers™! © 2002, RobotSlave. You may not reproduce this material, in whole or in part, without written permission of the owner.

	Testing... (none / 0) (#17)
	by tkatchev on Tue Nov 6th, 2001 at 02:06:16 AM PST

	♥ ♥ ♥ HUGS N KISSES !! ♥ ♥ ♥ -- Peace and much love...

	There's a very simple solution to that (none / 0) (#18)
	by Anonymous Reader on Wed Nov 7th, 2001 at 01:33:50 PM PST

	All those things (apart from your rather subjective concept of `interfering with a womans body' which is often used as an argument AGAINST contraception and abortion) are the result of Britain invading ireland a few hundred years ago. The various Irish armies has killed a good deal many innnocent citizens, but they're just as evil as the various British armies which have starved, raped and killed the ciotizens of the country they invaded. Killing innocent people is disgusting no matter whom you are. Your rant is very one sided.

	I think we all (5.00 / 1) (#9)
	by Mint Waltman on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 02:39:52 PM PST

	.. know from where Fawkes received his instructions. But Pope Clement VIII died in the spring of 1605, and was succeeded by Pope Leo XI on Low Sunday. So whether it was Pope Clement who gave the instructions before his death, or perhaps Pope Leo, looking to beging his reign with a real bang so to speak, I suspect we will never know until The Vatican opens its archives.

	Catholic radicalism (5.00 / 3) (#7)
	by nx01 on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 12:29:16 PM PST

	I just hope hateful Catholic radicalism as personified by Guy Fawkes is indeed a thing of the past. Indeed. The Pope would look silly with an automatic weapon. "Every time I look at the X window system, it's so fucking stupid; and part of me feels responsible for the worst parts of it." -- James Gosling

	hat... (none / 0) (#13)
	by philipm on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 08:41:06 PM PST

	I disagree. Why do you think his hat is so big and shaped like a bullet? Did you stop and think about that absolutely obviousl radical liberal symbolism? It is inconcievable that there are no bullets in that hat. I wish the pope was a naked beautiful woman so i could have sex with her. --philipm

	irony? surely not. (none / 0) (#10)
	by linuxrulez on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 06:27:00 PM PST

	I thought irony belonged to the old world, the one that ended on September 11th. We're all being very sincere around these parts.

	Dude, DUDE! (none / 0) (#19)
	by Anonymous Reader on Mon Nov 12th, 2001 at 09:14:15 AM PST

	Typical Geek's piece was finely crafted, yet you came in like a bull in a china shop and gauchely proclaim, "IRONY, IRONY! EVERYONE LOOK! I RECOGNIZED THE IRONY! Did you???" This is not The Onion - every page on adequacy.org is laced with irony. My point is that there are only trace elements of irony in this article, not visible to the naked eye, and I did fear that Americans would, as is usual, miss out. I chose an unbiased pointer so that they may educate themselves. If I wanted to educate them directly, I would have said "it's kinda like the fifth of july, but not in july?". I just hope hateful Catholic radicalism as personified by Guy Fawkes is indeed a thing of the past. See, now that's more like it. If you'd got in a dig about Guido getting funding from the pilgrims, it could have been superb.

	You must be a blast at surprise parties (none / 0) (#20)
	by Anonymous Reader on Mon Nov 12th, 2001 at 09:26:34 AM PST

	nt

	What? (none / 0) (#21)
	by Mint Waltman on Mon Nov 12th, 2001 at 10:54:37 AM PST

	This is not The Onion - every page on adequacy.org is laced with irony. What does a humor page like The Onion, the sole purpose of which is to get a rise out of people, have to do with adequacy.org? I come to adequacy to engage in the discussion of topics that are too controversial for other weblogs, not to make myself or others laugh. I have never posted an insincere or 'ironic' statement in the time I've been visiting here. In fact, such posts would be promptly and deservedly deleted by the editors in the name of adequacy's anti-youknowwhat policy.

	I come not to bury Caeser but to praise him (none / 0) (#22)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue Nov 13th, 2001 at 12:16:15 PM PST

	What does a humor page like The Onion, the sole purpose of which is to get a rise out of people, have to do with adequacy.org? One is based on satire and sarcasm, and the other is founded on irony. Many americans don't know there is a difference. I come to adequacy to engage in the discussion of topics that are too controversial for other weblogs, not to make myself or others laugh. Have you seen adequacy.org's pretty topic icon with the moon on it? Nice, isn't it?

	who are you calling ignorant? (none / 0) (#12)
	by philipm on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 08:36:12 PM PST

	first of all, just because i responded to this post, I am not ignorant. I would however like to point out that non of the other responders had that disclaimer, and your insult was accurate.......... for them!!!!!!!! I, however, AM NOT IGNORANT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why do you have the need to explain who guy fawkes is? Were you abused as a little kid? Did your schoolteacher molest you? Do not tell me what is ironical and what is not, you mendicant! -groo --philipm

	Not only that, (none / 0) (#4)
	by tkatchev on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 11:48:16 AM PST

	November 7 is the anniversary of the 1917 Russian Revolution. Happy Lenin Day, for all you liberalists! -- Peace and much love...

	I've had it with ye lot bad mouthin' the Church... (5.00 / 1) (#16)
	by Anonymous Reader on Mon Nov 5th, 2001 at 10:45:53 PM PST

	Pogue mahone, protestant skoom! Guy Fawkes sure'n was a true blue (er shuld ay say green) HERO! Yer dyke queen LEZabeth an' her witch burnin' kind er all hog fookers. The Real IRA's bombs had all yer slimy orange kind shittin' their knickers. Ye couldnae come crawlin' ta the negotiatin' table fast enuff. Ye can make all the Lucky Charms jokes ye want, ye fookin' poofters: fact remains, ONE IRELAND, FREE, UNITED, and CATHOLIC is the future. All ye knock-kneed heretic protestie skoom can fookin' well swim back te bloody england. Cuchulain! Mad King Sweeny! Ossian! Guy Fawkes! Wolf Tone! W. B. Yeats! Flann O'Brien! Jimmy Joyce! Sam Beckett! Seamus Heaney! What've ye lot got ta compare ta that bunch? Aye: fuck all's right! Fookin' SPICE GIRLS! Suck it up, ye snaggle-toothed, tea-drinking fairies!

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective companies. Comments are owned by the Poster. The Rest ® 2001, 2002, 2003 Adequacy.org. The Adequacy.org name, logo, symbol, and taglines "News for Grown-Ups", "Most Controversial Site on the Internet", "Linux Zealot", and "He just loves Open Source Software", and the RGB color value: D7D7D7 are trademarks of Adequacy.org. No part of this site may be republished or reproduced in whatever form without prior written permission by Adequacy.org and, if and when applicable, prior written permission by the contributing author(s), artist(s), or user(s). Any inquiries are directed to legal@adequacy.org.