What the hell was that anyway? While I long for the gentle loving touch of a kind woman as much as the next guy, I don't tend to enjoy movies where romance is the main plot point. I'm sorry, the whole thing looked a little too heavy on the lovey-dovey, cuddly-wuddly, huggy-kissy stuff, and a little too light on the rockem-sockem, epic violence.

I am sure I will be drawing a bit of ire here, but I think this summer, our wise editors will be reconsidering their choice of mascot. After only 2 minutes, I was already sick of Ms. Portman's mumbling, monotone voice, and her lifeless acting style.

As a replacement, I submit Ms. Kirsten Dunst. Watch the Spider-Man trailer to find out why.