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Who isn't sick to death of those smug individuals who build their own PCs and then proceed to tell us all about it. Who hasn't wondered how difficult it can be ? Here's a technical article for the rest of us in which adequacy.org demystifies the act of building your own PC from components.
A lot of you have mailed us at adequacy.org telling us of your dream of building your own PC. You have been drooling over the custom built rocket that your tech-savvy neighbor built for a lot less bucks than Dell or Gateway. You told us how a stream of unitelligible techno-babble and gobbledygook nonsense spewed forth from the "rocket scientist" genius-next-door when you, as a mere 'normal' person dared to ask Mr Elite Hacker how to build a computer. You told us of the utter scorn heaped on you by the tech-support monkeys when you accidentally asked for SIMMS when you meant to ask for DIMMS. With this in mind, we at adequacy.org offer this time saving guide on DIY PC building. Written by our team of PC experts, and carefully designed to remove the steaming piles of bullsh*t that surround this 'black art', we will take you step by step through the extremely simple process of building your new PC from scratch. We cut through the layers of confusing jargon put there by people who want to seem clever. We share the jealously guarded secrets of the pros. You will soon realize that there is nothing difficult about building your own dream PC. You will soon be shooting the breeze with Mr. Nerdy next door about Ram, Rom, RIMM, motherboards and bus speeds like a pro, as you "surf the net" on your newly built dream machine. |
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The first thing to do is to make it clear that we are talking about a USEFUL PC for a NORMAL person. By a normal person, we mean someone of average intelligence, and someone who has no patience with technological obfuscation. Someone who can program a VCR but who has no desire to take it apart to see if they can get it to rewind faster by replacing the drive motor with the larger one they removed from their kitchen blender. In short, if you are a habitual reader of sites like these, or if you look anything like this or this then this guide is not for you. Please look elsewhere.
We will not be talking about overclocking, FSB speeds, thermal compound, so-called 'alternative' Operating Systems or any of that elitist BS. After reading this jargon-free guide your eyes will not glaze over as you fall into a boredom induced coma. You will not tear it up in frustration at all the complex indecipherable acronyms. You will however, be able to build a perfectly functional PC, that will do what you need it to. No more, No less. So without further ado, let's get you started on your exciting PC-building adventure. First, you will need to buy some components. (If you have an old PC, you can probably save a bit of money by cannibalizing some parts from it, but its better to get new components since they will last longer). It is important not be intimidated by the salespeople. Remember, they know little more than you do. And you have this guide to fall back on. So call a few suppliers with your credit card at the ready. Here is your 'rocket scientists' shopping list :-) You will need to buy the following components:
OK so you have got all your components home, and unwrapped them. The next part should take about twenty minutes max. You are going to build your PC (and guess what ? it is not going to be rocket science). Clear a space on the table. Get all the components out of their protective wrappers and put them on the table in front of you. (Don't worry about all that garbage about wearing an anti-static suit. Almost nobody bothers these days. Modern components are surprisingly resistant to static shock, and the cost of the anti-static gear is not justified by the risks. If you are concerned about static electricity damage, we suggest you simply turn on the air conditioning. This has the effect of reducing the relative humidity, which in turn removes the static electricity from the air.) So where to start ? It's all pretty obvious and easy. If you think of it like an Erector Set, or Lego you will feel more confident. Make sure your tech-savvy friends are nowhere to be seen, you don't want to listen to their snotty and superior 'advice', and you don't want them laughing if you make a mistake. So here is a step-by-step guide to assembling your new PC.
AT LAST! You are done. You should now have a fully functional PC. Its now time to fire it up for the first time and install Windows Millenium. Insert the Windows Millenium CD into the drive and switch on your computer. Follow all the instructions on the screen. About 10 minutes later you will have a freshly installed machine ready to do productive work. All for about $500 at today's prices, plus the satisfaction of knowing you have beaten those irritating amateur experts at their own game. Now you can go around telling everyone you know how easy it was. The more people we let in on this PC industry 'secret' the better. Those annoying conversations round the water cooler with people who think they are so clever because they built their own PC will soon be a thing of the past. Just keep telling everyone how easy it was and point them to this page if they need any more help. |