You may have heard about
Linux - a
hobbyist operating system based on the
shareware principle, has been making waves in the
hacker underground and in the periphery of
large corporations for around five years now. Linux is a competent operating system which can even be said to compete with professionally designed OS's such as
Microsoft Windows XP. Nothing remarkable there, after all the market place for other goods has
many examples of
competing products which are
all but identical to the casual observer.
What many people do not realise is that to some of its advocates, Linux is more than a simple tool to get a job done. To these extremists, Linux represents a philosophical almost religious belief system - a way of life based around "open source" and "free software".
You may have encountered one of these Linux evangelists at work. They make themeselves known by constantly berating Microsoft products, and blindly praising Linux. Their belief in the power of Linux is akin to the Muslim's belief in Allah. In fact, fundamentalist Islam and hardcore Linux zealotry are two sides of the same coin. Press a Muslim as to why he or she is a Muslim, and they will suggest you read the Qu'raan. Ask a Linux apologist why Linux is better than the alternatives and the explanation you are most likely to hear is "Linux Rocks - Micro$oft Sucks"
The Linux Zealot typically displays an irrational hatred of Microsoft, a complete conviction that his choice of operating system is the only valid one, and a scathing patronising contempt of anyone "stupid" enough to use "windoze"*.
What causes this mindless OS bigotry? you may be wondering. Well, the father of modern psychoanalysis - Professor Sigmund Freud proposed an idea which he called the "narcissism of minor
differences". Put simply it means that people hate other people who are very similar to them. This similarity threatens their sense of individuality, their sense of self, causing them to react in a hostile manner, which seems to become more hostile, the closer the similarity.
We can see this effect in conflicts all aroung the world. From the (white, Christian) Catholics and Protestants in war-torn Northern Ireland, to the (white, Christian) Serbs and Croats in the former Yugoslavia, to the (Monotheistic) Muslims and Jews, semite brothers in hatred.
In the same way that Arabs and Jews differ very little in genetic make-up and yet almost every single one of them hates the other with a passion, Windows and Linux have very much in common and yet their supporters fight tooth-and-nail over which one is "best".
No doubt a qualified psychologist or doctor could come up with all
kinds of elaborate theories as to why the Linux Zealot behaves the way he
does. One theory I have is that the Linux Zealots have small penises
and belittling others for their choice of operating system is their way of
'getting back' at society and the world for their unfortnate genetic inheritance.
Another possibility is that due to the aforementioned hygiene problems the typical Linux Zealot cannot get laid, and subliminates his frustrated sexual energy into blaming Microsoft for all the evils of the world.
But I expect you have heard enough of my amateur psychology, I am interested in what you, the adequacy readers think. Why do these Linux advocates get so riled up about something so utterly insignificant as choice of OS ? Surely they cannot all be mentally ill ? (however intuitively obvious that answer might be)
*Windoze, Micro$oft, Microshaft, Winblows, etc are all terms used by Linux Zealots. If you recieve an e-mail containing any of these terms, you can be sure you have a Zealot on your hands.