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 The Day the Dopes Came Over

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Feb 18, 2002
I had these neighbors. They lived downstairs. It was a couple, a "sister" of one of the two and two screaming brats. One screaming brat was the couple's and one was the "sister"'s.

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These people were stalking me. Everytime I would take a shower, no matter what absurd time it was, one of them would start a shower five minutes later. This would leave me quivering in shock from the freezing water.

It didn't stop there. Any time I would leave to go somewhere, someone from the drug-den below me would inevitably decide to collect their screaming brat and go somewhere. I would be left waiting at the door while their screaming brat stood in the doorway to the building screaming. Usually the second screaming brat would also lunge out of the apartment, with it's mother screaming after it. The second screaming brat would then stand in the doorway with the first screaming brat and scream.

The only contact I've ever had with these people were those times when I would run into them this way (basically, any time I left the apartment) and one time when the Post Office accidentally delivered the guy's hustler to my mailbox. Filthy pervert.

Friday, I was having lunch with some open-source mullet-head and was telling this questionable character all about my problem with the stalkers downstairs. After lunch, I stopped by the bank to deposit my check. Of course, the stalkers were in the line next to me. Complete with both screaming brats. I completed my transaction as quickly as possible and sped home before I would have to wait at the door while the screaming brats stood there blocking my way while they screamed.

When I pulled up to the parking lot, I was shocked to see the couple's car on a carrier attached to the back of a U-Haul! I now have the entire third floor to myself and nobody is living directly below me.

If I had any sense, I would move too. Fuckers.


Sorry (3.00 / 2) (#1)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Feb 18th, 2002 at 03:54:43 AM PST
Maybe they got tired of you stalking them?

You're lucky they've gone (5.00 / 1) (#2)
by Ernest Bludger on Mon Feb 18th, 2002 at 06:11:29 AM PST
They may have been Annunaki lizards from the fourth dimension. They probably had to leave to get to Princess Margaret's funeral.

open-source mullet-head?! (3.00 / 2) (#3)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Feb 18th, 2002 at 07:36:55 AM PST
you hang around some questionable characters. does this mean that osm (you) and osm (the open source mullet) had lunch together? two osms in one place? and the fabric of reality did not tear, twist, or bend?

You poor guy. (5.00 / 1) (#4)
by Anonymous Reader on Mon Feb 18th, 2002 at 02:29:29 PM PST
Do you still have the Hustler?


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